Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Bad Relationship.

Most of the time I find myself questioning the idea of "why the hell people bother............"
Bothering in many different ways.
Like, love life, LIFE itself, basically almost everything.
Some people say that people bother because they care. Really?
I thought people bother because they are just basically NOSY.
People are so phony that they just want to know every little detail just to make sure they run their mouths about it.
You see, it's human basic nature to KNOW about everything, to be CURIOUS about everything.
But what happens in my life recently, is actually people trying to step into my life without considering whether it's affecting me or not, whether they understand or not.
It doesn't matter to them if they do not understand the idea or what it feels like, what matters the most is that they acknowledge something that is required - in which i really have no idea why people are so eager to find out about other's life.
Seriously, I don't really care if one get married, have baby, get divorced, and re-married.
Most people find it daunting or revolting, but really?
How do you see it?
Do you see it from YOUR life point of view - in which throughout your life you have never experienced anything close to that kind of shit?
Do you see it from the way you try to empathize or pity that particular person?
EITHER way won't work.
Because the idea of YOU, trying to empathize is just not enough, not even close.
There is a big difference in experiencing the actual shit and just trying to embrace and put yourself in that situation.
No matter how sensitive you are, you just can't.
In the end what you would actually give is mere pity and casual sympathy.

Simplest example, when people find out you break up with somebody, the first question pops up is: HOW COME?
seriously? "How come" is like you stab someone's flesh and ask "how does it feel?"
IT IS OBVIOUS that something happened.
The next question after answering that first silly question is: WHO BROKE WHO?
This is tricky.
When a girl breaks up with a boy, people will see either this girl is seeing somebody else or the boy is a jerk so she breaks up with him.
Can't there be any other possibilities?
Possibility #1: she is a jerk and he is a victim.
Possibility #2: he is a jerk and she is too. So it is equal.
Possibility #3: false alarm. They thought they were meant to be but appeared not in the end.
Possibility #4: both decision because they are smart enough to stop stupid relationship that has no future.
Possibility #5: she's fed up with ever-changing-no-future-situation that makes her waste her time or vice versa.
and millions other possibilities that I am too lazy to wander around.

But then the next question or statement, or anything that will pop up is: WHY CAN'T YOU WORK THINGS OUT? CAN'T THERE BE ANOTHER CHANCE FOR YOU TWO TO GET BACK TOGETHER?

It's like coming back to the first question ever. Like it's not clear enough why two break up in the first place.
It's like asking "is it painful?" when you sprinkle salt into open wound.

What happened to me is that people find out I broke him up and they start to question "why did i do that", "what happened during the last 5 years?", "can't you work things out?", "how does it make him feel?", "do you still love him?", "does he feel okay about it?" and so on.

But is it fulfilling their needs if i answer all of those questions?
Not a slight chance.
They will keep asking me questions and giving me statements which make me want to rip my heart out and smack it into their faces. (sarcasm alert)

The worst statement that still lingers in my brain is when one person said: You mistreated him badly.
Right, of course it's me.
I'm the one who broke him up.
I'm the one who is seeing another man.
and I'm the bad guy.

But then do I care?
*laughing like hyena*
I only care when people say things when they even forget to put their brains on.
It's merely stupid statement that I find very intriguing to discuss.

People can be so offensive, so why can't I?

Who went through the last 5 years?
Who felt every littlest detail for the last 5 years?
Who knew how difficult it was to figure every way out?
Who understood the feeling of being in that relationship?

Do I waste my time? NO.
I don't think the last 5 years all I did was wasting my time.
He once made me fall head over heels.
He once showed me how to laugh and cry.
It's fair enough I spent the last 5 years to understand what kind of relationship I really want.
It's worth this understanding, what I want and what I don't want.
It made me stronger and wiser.
And what makes me extremely thankful is how it made me finally found someone who can fulfill those empty gaps throughout the past few years.

Bad relationship makes you understand what good relationship feels like.
Bad relationship makes you understand that you are strong enough to stand on your on feet.
Bad relationship shows that there is a better person out there.
Bad relationship shows that you are more than capable of getting closer to the perfect one.
Bad relationship shows how awesome your ability to survive is.
Bad relationship makes you learn that tears are only for those who worth it.
Bad relationship makes you learn that you are not alone who goes through hell.
But most important things is that, bad relationship is a mere stepping stones to happily ever after (:

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Lingering with impossibility.

I just want someone who i can call on my own.
Who is crazily enough just to stay awake with me all night.
Who is strong enough, to just constantly and patiently hugging me all night long, giving me affection, loving me without expecting me to do the same.
I want someone who knows me too well, even he knows what i am about to say before i do say it.
I want someone who is willingly wait and smile outside my house during pouring rain just to see me.
I want someone who thinks everyday is like the last chance for him to see me, to be with me. So that he never gets tired loving me.
I want someone who doesn't acknowledge the word "tired", "sleepy", "sick".
I want someone who always adores me even there are so many beautiful girls before me.
I want someone who always looks in me in the eyes each time he sees me, with that exact same sparkle in his eyes.
I want someone who never gets tired to bear with my stupidity, stubbornness, and emotions.
I want someone who knows that i am madly in love with him and always smiles whenever he remembers that.
I want someone who holds me in his arms whenever i am about to run away.
I want someone who pull me closer whenever i walk away.
I want someone who sits silently beside me whenever i don't feel like talking at all. And then he smiles at me and loves me with his soothing eyes, tells me "everything is gonna be alright"
I want someone who is not afraid to touch me even when i am mad. Really mad.
I want someone who knows exactly what he is doing, so surely, that he doesn't lose his direction to walk with me.
I want someone who understands the meaning behind my words.
I want someone who sings me lullaby every night and makes me smile, then closes my day by saying "goodnight, gorgeous. You are loved"
I want someone, who can show me, no, who loves me, with all his might with everything he does.
I don't have to question it.
I don't have to struggle with disbelieve or doubts.
I want someone who is, by just holding my hands, can tell his feelings.
I want someone who always wants me, without me saying it out loud.
I want someone who won't make me feel unwanted, not once.
I want someone who knows he is different and makes me feel it.
I want someone who stays awake just to see me, just to look at me, just to adore me, just to make me feel comfortable, at all cost.

But is it even possible?
Am i asking too much?
What if i just ask for love. No, ask for someone who makes me feel loved?
Is it possible then?

Do you, ever?

Do you ever wonder, how sometimes you wish there is such thing called phase one of love exists forever?
Phase one is where everything is beautiful and happy, where all goodness belongs, and there is no tear to be shed.
No arguments.
No fights.
No shouting at each other.
No headaches.

Some say that love takes its better state when two get into argument and solve things out. But really, is it necessary?
When all of those silly arguments happen, exactly at the time where everything is so comfortable, when two are in the most comfortable state.

What i see in my perspective is that comfort zone is such a big bullshit.
It's just a gate to something called "taking for granted".
It's just reason created to say that "hey now that i am fairly sure you'd stay and i am so damn comfortable with you, now i can take you for granted, now i can do things i have been struggled to resist lately" in other word, it's just reason for people to change but not be able to admit that they're changed and it's time when all goodness comes to an end.

That's why there is a saying: all good times come to an end.

But can we really have, create a relationship that stays in phase pne until forever?
I doubt it though.

Phase one.
Is those times when we begin as strangers, getting to know each other. No, we want to know each other so much that we listen to every single detail, and magically everything sticks to the mind. (What an amazing human brain ability)

Is those times, when everything the other person does is amazing, cute, adorable, magically beautiful, and so on. Whatever it is, pretty in the eyes and thought. Which, later on suddenly disappear or even there is a probability of getting high and dry.

Is those times when arguments seem so far far away, like almost unreachable (no, it really is deceiving) 

Is those times when you stay up late, really late just to hear their voices.
Just to understand even more, just to bear with it, just to embrace all happiness just by doing so.
Crazy until morning telephone calls, laughing all night long, giggling, amazed, wondering how lovable that person is.
Which one day will all be disappeared. As if that thing never exists in the first place.

Is those times when every text message is like letter from heaven. Can easily be enlightening a super tough shitty day.

Is those times when everything is being done just to see their faces, just to meet them, just to be with them. 
It's like you're being zombie; you don't feel sleepiness, don't feel sickness, don't feel fatigue, don't need sleep, eat, or even tired means nothing at all. It's like everyday is the last day of getting a chance to see them.
Make a very good use of each day!
Which one day will definitely become boredom, routine, and just a compulsory needs. (Yeah... Tiring. I know)

Is those times when every love songs mean everything, mean a lot, and mean the world of our own. You don't even need a radio, those love songs rewinding continuously in your head. (An amazing brain ability, once again)

Is those times when hugging is addicting.

Is those times when all sweet words dancing around.

Is those times when you don't remember that there are millions of other people exist. World belongs to both of you.

Is those times when there is no ego or selfishness. As if both of you are saints. Pure and need no earthy needs. What an angel!

Is those times when waiting is the hardest thing to do, oh yeah you hate ticking clock! It only reminds you of how long you really have to wait until the next time you get to see the other person. Oh yes, i know how devastating it could be. Ad how awful it makes you.

Is those times when "i love you" is the best 3 words in the world. It's like alien language that you become amazed whenever you hear or say it. You can't stop smiling about it.

Is those times when there is only BOTH OF US.

Ever wondered where did all of those goodness go?
Is there a really bad monster that eats all of those goodness?
And when you try to recreate it, you wonder why it doesn't feel the same, why doesn't it feel right?

Because the two of you are no longer the same persons you used to be.
And you begin to hate the changes.

You begin to think, where is this person i loved the most?
Why do you stop trying?
Wondering do you still love me?
Wondering is the love getting lesser?
Is there such thing as losing the feeling you used to have?
I mean is it possible?

Is it true that love can disappear slowly, or is it never really that strong in the beginning?
Is everything you felt in phase one merely illusions?
Is everything ever coming back?
Will you ever feel those goodness again?

Love never is complicated. People are.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Love is something beyond the grasp of my heart ability.

As someone always says that "love is something I'll never understand" 
Frankly it gets me thinking right now how it affects me so much 
Not in a bad way --it kept me wondering what is it that caused such statement exists?  

To be honest I am not that clever when it comes to love 
I always am dumbfounded. 
I don't really know much Im not an expert, far from it  
But I've been learning couple of lessons recently 
I learned that:
 1. Shit happens anytime, anywhere, from or with anyone. You just can't avoid it. But at least what you can do is to change your attitude. But then, it never gets any easier. Not, when it happens in between your great mood.  

2. Not everybody. I repeat, NOT EVERYBODY understands you. Seriously, even your closest people, Or shall I say friend(s) can easily misunderstand you. Or even I might say, don't the hell care about your feeling. Once At a time, occasionally happens: the closest people are ones who hurt you the most. Without they even realizing it. Thus, understanding yourself is the biggest reward you can give to yourself.  

3. You can never understand the art of giving when you never take anything from anybody. What I meant here is that how can you give something, anything, everything, when you never learn how to take it from somebody or other people? It's not about being selfish or self-centered, it is about the idea of appreciating what people have to sacrifice in order for you to grasp that that has to be mutual.  

4. You hurt others as much as they hurt you. It's not how you let people hurt you, it's bascically how you perceive what people do. To let or not to let is another level of understanding, in which I don't really see as something pivotal when you really care after someone, even their intention is not hurting you by all means, when you perceive it as a threat, it is. A different story when you don't the hell care about someone, seriously would you see their threat as something that even slit your most surface skin? I don't think so, you'd be safe and sound in your own skin. You see, eye for an eye.  

5. don't get involved in any chain reaction. Nah! I'm kidding. There is no way you can't get involved in any chain reaction relationship when you are connected to A B C D E F G, you name it. You know A in which he/she has issue with D And so on. As long as you're in e circle, there is no way you would stay out of the line. Even if you are, I don't think you don't get any impact, pretty much it gets on your nerve occasionally.  

6. People never change. Even if they do, I don't think it's something within your perimeter. I mean, so much you want someone to change according what you ink it's what best suits them, you'll eventually die in vain. People don't change, they just becoming alien. Like fairy tale, change doesn't exist. Not in human dictionary. I am not being pessimist, it's just the way human nature is.  

7. As much as you want to get what you want, as much as you can't. Love involves minimum of two something connected to each other. Which means, you can synchronize two different brains, hearts, ANYTHING into one. You can merely sync them together, but not with emerging.  

 I am not pretty sure that love is all to blame, i always believe, blame the people, not the game. 

Thus, if love is the game, whom should we blame after?  


If I have to rephrase it, my own statement would be:  
People, are bunch of individuals I will never understand.  

Because initially love is so simple that it embodies the idea of ABSOLUTE.  
What makes it complicated (according to our human brain) is actually ourselves. 
When we choose to embody the love itself, it is when we, are ones who complicate it. 

In addition of involving two, TWO individuals together.  
You see my point?  

DOUBLE COMPLICATION = absolute madness!  

Love losts its meaning 
Love losts its authenticity 
Love losts its idea 
Love losts people  

Therefore, it comes to certain point that people manipulates love.

Monday, March 12, 2012

HUMAN BE(ing).

human being is a complex living creature that when we think of it, our own characteristics can be defined in MILLION ways. You name it: biology, psychology, anthropology, history, linguistic, culture, etc.

“Human beings are funny. They long to be with the person they love but refuse to admit openly. Some are afraid to show even the slightest sign of affection because of fear. Fear that their feelings may not be recognized, or even worst, returned. But one thing about human beings puzzles me the most is their conscious effort to be connected with the object of their affection even if it kills them slowly within.” --Sigmund Freud
even Kahlil Gibran mentioned:

"The eye of a human being is a microscope, which makes the world seem bigger than it really is."  
--Khalil Gibran
 have you ever wondered how AMAZING we are, as a being, keep searching about what we really are?

There's a reason why people are busy defining others.
The same reason why people judge others.
The same reason why there is such thing called, GETTING-TO-KNOW-EACH-OTHER

(yes, you know where this is going)

The same reason why people are so nosy
The same reason why people need others

That leads to the reason why people love each other.

Think about it.

Why do we bother to find similarities, or differences, between two different gender individuals?
If it is not to define who we really are, ourselves.
We need other people to define who we are.
We need others to make ourselves see what we are.
What kind of person, am I.

According to Biology, Human beings are animals.

According to Psychology: Unlike physical objects and animals, human beings are self-conscious and can,
therefore, subject themselves to their own study. 

human being
a member of any of the races of Homo sapiens; person; man, woman, or child
And plenty more.
I am going to focus on culture and social interpretation.
Simply, life surroundings.

I recall one of my friend's friend told her that we (me and my friend) are the kind of girls who are beyond average level.
He defines that we are the type of people who don't bother about how much money we spend, how we perceive anything in life as easy breezy, that we don't understand the idea of "struggling" or "surviving" because everything is served right in front of our eyes.
In addition to that, he just met me and barely talked (aside from introducing myself and himself), and I just sit in front of him, talked to my friend for less than an hour.

See my point?
I am judged by other people in less than one hour, simply by observing the content of conversation I had with my friend, in which at that time, not knowing the probability whether I was bluffing or talking the real thing.

Simply from that, I know, that every second counts.
We, human beings, prone to judge others by a second of looking/hearing/smelling.
Human perceiving power is kinda scary, to say.

Another example:
I once asked my bestfriend, "what kind of person am I?"
We have been friends for like YEARS.
Her answer was simply based on how I treat her, the way I talk, the way I tell story, and how she sees me as a person, subjectively.
Without deriving the facts objectively.
Her answer was not wrong, at all.
But was not correct, in a way that she only says things she have been observing throughout the years, based on how I act when I am with her or things I do in my life.

See, how subjective human beings are?
In our everyday life we behave in different ways and use the term 'behaviour' to refer to the verbal and physiological responses and actions
Most of human beings see, perceive, think of other people as what they interpret.

While studying human behaviour we need to remember the following:
(i) Changes are observed in individuals due to maturation, learning and ageing.
(ii) Human behaviour at any moment is a joint function of the personal
characteristics and the properties of environment.
(iii) The measurement of psychological attributes (e.g., personality, intelligence,
interest, attitude) is usually indirect and based on inferences.
(iv) Many aspects of social behaviour are rule-governed and culture specific.
(v) Human behaviour is usually determined by multiple causes

However, as it is mentioned above, there are several points that need to be taken when it comes to observing a human being.
But mostly what people do is merely based on
1. what we are wearing
2. what we are talking
3. what we are driving
4. what we are doing for living (job, salary, title)
5. what we do on social media

Honestly speaking, do we really ever ask someone "What do you know about yourself?"
when we are casually talking, or when we get to know each other?
It is barely happening.
But I guess mostly people will answer "You tell me"
Because it is HARD to define who we really are.
It is DIFFICULT to describe what kind of person we are.
Without prior self-observation.
Without asking others "What kind of person do you think I am?"
Because once again, we are subjectively, unconscious or consciously thinking, perceiving one self as what we interpret.
Thus, it is hard to define ourselves without trying to avoid the tendencies that we say simplest thing about ourselves.

(See my point? That an individual is even hardly know him/herself)

Usually when people ask someone that question, "What do you know about yourself?"
Or I shall rephrase it, when I ask someone that question, most answers I get:
1. They ask it back
2. "I am who I am"
3. "I am me" (right, reminds me of ris low)
4. I am kind, blablablabla (standard adjectives)
5. I don't know

And mostly I find that it takes several minutes of pause after the question is given.

Maybe it's time to think about it from now on.
Who do you think you are according to yourself?
I mean, who else knows yourself better but you?
And once you know and understand who/what you are, take a leap of faith.
Stand on your feet (:

I challenge myself:
I am going to sit frequently somewhere in public area, and I am going to observe particular people that seem interesting to me, I am going to make sketch(es) and do my own interpretation about those people. ;)


Tuesday, January 10, 2012


Salah satu alasan kenapa saya malas mengunjungi salon disini adalah urusan tip.

Bukan karena saya pelit.
Bukan karena saya males.
Bukan karena saya enggan.
Bukan juga karena saya gak punya uang.

Saya malas karena saya tidak mengerti apa alasan memberi tips di Indonesia.

Pertama, yang namanya tip itu diberikan secara sukarela oleh customer atas penghargaan akan rasa puas terhadap service yang sudah diberikan. Tapi disini tip itu menjadi sebuah KEHARUSAN yang kalau tidak dilakukan akan membuat kita merasa gimana-gimana.

Kedua, tidak ada aturan baku mengenai seberapa banyak kita harus memberikan tip disini. Misalnya saja, jika aturan tip adalah 15% dari biaya service, seandainya saya potong rambut di salon dan membayar Rp 400.000,- untuk potongan rambut tersebut, apakah saya harus memberikan tip dengan jumlah Rp 60.000,-? WOW! Lalu di saat yang sama biasanya saya harus membayar tip untuk pencuci rambut dan pengeblow rambut juga. Untuk ke salon saja saya harus merogoh kocek minimal Rp 100.000,- hanya untuk tip? Buat saya, jujur itu buang-buang uang saja. Bukan pelit, tapi itu realita yang tidak realistis.

Okay, saya ingin mendapatkan service yang baik dan kalau bisa hubungan antara hairdresser dan pelanggan yang baik tanpa harus merogoh kocek untuk tip sebesar itu disini, tapi rasanya kok susah?

Di SG saya biasa potong rambut dengan harga $50 sudah termasuk cuci rambut, blow variasi, dan juga tidak perlu memberi tip karena saya sudah kenal baik dengan hairdressernya (awal kali kesana juga tidak perlu memberi tip). Karena kadang pemberian tip di SG sana bisa jadi sebuah insult karena memang jarang ada pemberian tip di salon.
Saya bukan seseorang yang pelit tip jika memang servis memuaskan, tapi dimana dulu konteksnya. Jika saya pergi ke sebuah restoran dan pelayannya sangat memuaskan, saya tidak segan memberikan sisa kembalian atau tip yang sesuai untuk si pelayan. Karena memang kadang total bill yang ada belum termasuk service tax, atau juga kadang memang servisnya benar-benar memuaskan dan bikin saya betah lama-lama disana.
FYI, excellent service is so rarely found here!

Berikut contekan tips untuk tipping (taken from here):

Food ServiceBarista
No tip required, though many suggest throwing coins into the tip jar.
$1/drink (or 15% of total bill). Pre-tip for better service.
Delivery person (including pizza)
10%, $2 minimum 
Maitre d’
$5-$25 for special efforts
No tip required unless something special is done
15% for adequate service, 20% for exceptional service. For poor service, leave 10% or less. It’s okay to leave nothing for exceptionally poor service, but only if you’re sure it’s the waiter’s fault.
Hotel Staff
$1 to $2 per bag, $5 minimum. (Or, just as many places say $1 bag, $2 minimum.)
$5-$20 depending on the service. $20 if he does something exceptional. Nothing for directions.
$2 to $5 per night, paid daily or as a lump sum at checkout. (Most sites suggest you tip daily.)
Parking Valet
A wide range of opinions. Everyone agrees that you should pay when your car is retrieved. Some say to pay when it’s parked, too. Most sites say to tip $2, though some suggest $5.
Room service
$5 minimum (unless gratuity is included in check)
Bus driver (not mass transit)
$1 to $2, if she handles luggage
Cab driver
10%, $2-$5 minimum
Gas station attendant
Nothing. Or $2-$4. There’s no agreement. (I’ve never seen anyone tip a gas station attendant ever.)
$1 per bag. $2 for heavy items, or if porter brings luggage to counter.
Personal service
Again, little agreement: 10-15%, 15-20%, etc. One person recommends $5 to each individual who shampoos or blow-dries your hair!
Spa service
$2 or $3
Building superintendent
Varies —read more.
Coat checker
Most sites recommend $1 per coat, though one said $2 to $5 upon retrieval.
Furniture deliverer
It depends. Most of the time $5-$20. Some recommend simply offering cold drinks. 
Grocery store bagger
One site recommended $1-$3, though I’ve never seen one tipped in my life.
$10-$25 per person 
What about tipping at holidays? Tipping service people with whom you have regular contact can build goodwill. I found these recommendations:
Holiday Tips
  • Babysitter: one week’s pay
  • Doorman: bottle of wine or box of chocolates
  • Garbage collector: $15 to $25
  • Gardener: one week’s pay
  • Housekeeper: one week’s pay
  • Janitor: $15 to $25
  • Mail carrier: $15 to $20 (up to $20 non-cash)
  • Nanny: one week’s pay
  • Newspaper delivery person: $15 to $25
  • Parking attendant: $15 to $25
  • Personal trainer: $20 to $50 (tip discreetly)
Some points regarding tipping etiquette:
  • If you use a coupon or gift certificate, calculate your tip based on the total before discount.
  • Tip above the norm if:
    • Service is exceptional,
    • You’ve been a burden, or
    • You are a regular client.
  • Don’t tip if it’s not deserved. Poor service should not be rewarded.
  • In some circumstances, if you offer an initial tip — especially a large initial tip — you’ll get better service.
  • If you take up a restaurant table for a long time, tip extra.
  • Tip discreetly.
  • When in doubt, tip.
Dan kalau kata Kompas, lain lagi ceritanya.
Jadi yang mana yang benar?
Benarkah karena pengaruh budaya luar kita jadi kebiasaan memberikan tip?
Atau perlukah tip itu untuk menghargai servis baik yang telah kita terima?

Kalau saya sih jujur pinginnya ada aturan baku dan tertulis bahwa tipping itu hanya dilakukan secara sukarela, bukan "kebiasaan" atau "keharusan".
Tidak ada acara bete kalau tidak diberikan tip lalu di kunjungan berikutnya servis seenaknya.

Saya benar-benar malas jika harus ke salon, mengendap-endap atau sembunyi tangan memberikan uang ke tukang cuci rambut, si pemotong rambut, dan tukang blow. *phew*

Thursday, January 5, 2012

supermarket frenzy.

For some people who know me quite long enough must have known that I LOVE SUPERMARKET!
For some unknown reasons I just love visiting supermarket, any kind of it.
Maybe because there are a LOT of things on rack.
Or maybe because there are colorful items everywhere.
Or maybe just the overwhelming feeling surrounded by different goods.
I don't know, I love hang around in supermarket, whether it's just to spend time me waiting for something/someone, or to look around for some new items.

I used to love watching one tv show where several contestants were challenged to shop in a supermarket within several minutes and given budget.
I LOVE THAT SHOW SO MUCH that I used to wish that one day I would join that show.

Now to put that aside, it's not really what I want to talk about today.
Few days ago I went to supermarket quite in a rush in the evening because I forgot to buy Caesar's minced meat (he only wants to eat his dry dog food with a mixture of wet boiled minced meat), since it was almost closing time, you can see that all lines were packed.
And I always wonder why would a supermarket, big ones, build so many cashier tables yet they never open all if them especially in a crowded time.
It's just simply stupid.
When I was in Singapore, every cashiers were lined up with many people yet they managed to do things quickly, thus there was no necessarily super long queue, which I think it's not efficient.
So since I needed that item badly, I forced myself to patiently queue.
(No, fyi I don't like queuing for stupid reason like that).

Most of the time I experience, encounter, see, here in Indonesia, people don't like to queue, they FIND 1001 ways to either cut the queue, force the queue, or force themselves to slide in people's line.
Whatever it is, most of Indonesian people are not patient YET they have no manner.
So while I was queuing, the family whom standing in front of me consist of a husband, a wife, and two daughters.
What happened was, the mother was queuing and the other family members went around the supermarket to get things, so when all the members were gathered together, their basket were already full of things --which I thought the opposite therefore I queued there in the first place.
Nevermind, that thing doesn't bother me too much.
Then came another family pack with a trolley queuing behind me.

That.....when the problem came.
The problem that I seldom be able to hold back myself not to speak sarcastically.

This fat lady, were standing behind me, a bit to my right back, what happened was, she pushed her trolley TOO much further that the edge of the trolley hit my body.
one time.

Then came her daughter, which was fat as well, tried to slide in the line beside the trolley (you know it's just too much), so the trolley was moved further somemore.
two times.

I managed to keep calm and just constantly look at them occasionally, with a super warning eyes "IF YOU JUST DARE TO MOVE THAT TROLLEY AGAIN AND TOUCH ANY PART OF MY BODY I WILL DEFINITELY FLATTEN ALL OF YOUR FAMILY MEMBER WITH A BULLDOZER"
And instead of keeping their trolley an inch away, as if they didn't do it the line would be cut in or whatsoever, the daughter pushed the trolley for the third time!
For goodness sake I didn't want to rage in anger like a Godzilla, but it was too much!
I looked at the mother and I told her, "Even if you keep pushing your trolley you won't get any faster than anybody else so PLEASE stop pushing your trolley at me!"
With an ugly unpleasant face she finally told her daughter not to push the trolley again.

I don't get how most people don't understand the value or the meaning of PERSONAL SPACE.

You cannot just do things you-know-that's-wrong and just simply keep quiet or merely "oh" or merely look at me like you're an innocent little kid who would probably pull my hair to my scalp and simply laugh hysterically (trust me, my niece often does it and it's not funny).


You cannot simply step in other's people little space and ignore it.
How hard it is to say sorry?
If you are so reluctant to say "maaf" just say "sorry"
I know "maaf" is sooooo super hard to say as if you were born with English as your mother tongue
Just say sorry won't hurt you in any way, really.
In contrary it might save you from any sarcastic response or action.

As in the ATM machine queue line, don't step too further near the person using the machine, give a space at least 1 meter or more, no matter how hectic or crowded the situation is, you cannot stand too close, moreover with your breath in my neck.

No matter if you have little kids who are extremely wild or naughty, whenever your son/daughter does something wrong that invades other's people personal space or annoys people, you're the one who should say sorry and immediately teach your child to behave nicely.
You don't have to punch or hit your children for Godsake.
At least you say sorry in the first place, FIRST RULE!

I guess people should learn how to behave and know good manners in the first place before they start worrying about global warming or learning about eco green.
(I mean, sarcastically)

That's the first issue.
The second one happened when I was on the way back to home from my 7 days trip to central Java last week.
My family waited for my cousins to arrive at the rest area (we arrived first) in the parking lot.
We all finished our business (eat, toilet business) and headed back to car and decided to just wait inside because it was pretty crowded in the area.
The care on the right side of ours has just left, another car came and parked there.
What happened was, the person who sat in the front left opened his door and hit the side mirror of my car (which already in closed position, which should be safe enough not to bother the next car's door-opening way).
Just like that, and nothing happened.
No sorry facial expression.
No sorry came out of his mouth.
He knew there were people in my car.
The machine was on, moreover.

They were gone.
Came back in a few minutes.
Oh I noticed the man was a little bit more careful (good thing).
When suddenly I heard another loud sound from the side door, a girl opened her car's door with all might and hit mine.
I kept looking at her, expecting a little bit sorry expression.
What came out of her mouth was only "eh".
And then she got inside and done.

You know it's like you walk and accidentally bump someone, most of people here will only say "eh" or "oh" or instead give a sour pouty face as if I am the one who bumps them.
You cannot do that in any way, in any situation.

I never stop encouraging people to learn how to say SORRY and THANK YOU.
What hard it is to just say one or two little words: "Maaf" and "Terima Kasih"?
Instead of just OH-ing, EH-ing, or giving a shit sour face?

Btw one of my 2012 resolutions is: being more sarcastic to people with no manner; no sorry, no thank you.

Seriously next time I experience someone bumps me and just pass by, no sorry, or give me a sour ugly face I will definitely tell them "your face look like shit and you just bumped me and NO SORRY? Have a good day!"
I know I probably be seen like a crazy maniac, but then if I don't start, when will people realize it's a wrong thing to do?