monday is good.

i feel extremely bad mood today since i woke up
i guess it's a combination of lack sleeping+period+fatigue

i know, great combination to start a lazy (HEAVY) day
so i am horribly cranky all day long
little simple thing(s) can trigger my time bomb inside me

hahahaa........

*lebay (exaggerated)

but later on in the afternoon, a friend of mine asked whether we would like to hang out together
Rachel asked if we want to go karaoke in group/not
and i said HELL YEAAAHHH LET'S GO!

so i went to happy puppy with Nita
she was so nice picking me up from my house heheheheheheheheehehe

oh, i have not eaten anything since my breakfast
due to the hesitation to touch foods on table and the impact of having HAIRY nasi uduk in the morning UH!

oh btw, i encountered HAIRY foods since like couple days back while i was having my morning serabi
NASTY SUPER NASTY!
i always hate strand of hair in my food!!
but this morning i forced myself to continue eating (someone forced me to)



 and i ended up in toilet after i finished eating it. ARGH!

and since i barely touched the foods on table for lunch, i ended up had late snacking time
i ate snacks and mangoes for late lunch :/

rating: 3/5 can taste the milk yummm! :d

...........................................................................................

so anyway Nita and I reached first and we booked the room for karaoke (HURRAYYY!)
but since the others were being late
we decided to take a walk around the area
and we ate a grilled banana and a toast while we were waiting for them

grilled banana with chocolate, cheese, and milk ::2.5/5::

then we had karaoke for 1 hour
then we had dinner (food again!)

and i had INTERNET for the first time YAY!
INTERNET is not literary internet as in website etc.
INTERNET is a name of food. it is actually instant noodle (indomie) served with egg and cornet
hahaaha i have been wanting to try it since so long long long long long long super long time ago
wow after 22 years i have lived i finally tried it *lebay
hahahahaha!!!!

the taste? it is so-so
har har har

but hey, there's nothing wrong in trying something new at least now i know how does it taste like (:

INTERNET

then we went home

but wait

i promised someone that we would have dinner together today so I ATE AGAIN
hahahahahahahaah!!!!!!!

we went to dixie at benton junction
i had fried chicken with berry sauce and also sharing pizza
he ordered burger steak with steamed rice

the reviews and ratings for foods in dixie:
the pizza is ok.
it is 2.5/5

the burger steak tastes different from what i had long time ago
it is now 2/5

the fried chicken is still fine i give 2.5/5

.............................................................................................................................

and we ended up so full with foods

and now i am cuddling with blanket and pillow and my handsome MR. WHITE (:


and i am happy YES I AM HAPPY

what a good monday, remedy for my crankiness

oooh and btw i got this new maroon 5 cd, thanks to my lil bro who bought it yesterday :* xoxo

timeless time.

it's kinda weird whenever i think that, you know, friends last forever?
but do they?
i mean, how should i put this......

it's like now, for example.
i graduated from school, ready to embrace so-called "earning and experiencing REAL life", life becomes so dull
it feels like i've been losing so many friends along the way, along the journey
well not literary.
but it just feels like it?
I wonder if it's like this for every person or is it just me?

some of my buddies are busy with school, some are busy with work, some are busy i don't know what they're doing, some are just disappeared.
weird isn't it?

how back then we used to hang out together because we were bounded by certain common.
for example, first year of uni, we spent our times together because we wanted to share our stories and experiences in our different places.
we were bounded by it.

and now some are still in school, some are just graduated, some are working, and some are just plain jobless-busyless (yea my own word) like me HAHAHAHAHHAHA
now it feels like i laugh pathetically bout myself for being busyless.
geez

and now life feels so dull, well not fully dull, but it's just dull.
dull in a way that i can't just call a friend and ask them to hang out with me right away, i mean i should at least "book" them couple days/weeks/months prior to the event wth.
then other thing is that, i myself is free all the time, but not with the rest of my friends

and now i spent 4 years abroad, away from almost every friend i have - let's say i was "isolated" in a way that i separated from them whom i usually befriend with - and now i am back to my hometown, it feels like i'm some kind of alien

i barely know what's happening here
what's happening with my friends, my best friends
i feel like i am totally alienated by...........myself?????
):

yes i'm writing this as a form of protest, but whom am i protesting?
what am i protesting?
while along the journey i was alone - with new buddies abroad - whom i don't find them here in my hometown, none of them are here
so who am i shouting at?
nobody.
i simply shouting in my own mind, silently.

almost frustrated, no-not yet.
almost gone mad, i don't think i'm capable of.
angry, no don't think so.
sad, probably.
pathetic about myself, begin to.

i literary want to scratch wall due to this madness..... well i probably should do that, hoping that it'd ease the anxiety HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

maybe i simply am lonely ):
maybe i simply miss my friends, my best friends the most
maybe i simply miss hanging out with people who used to be there for me
maybe i simply am losing the presence of friendship
maybe i simply want to share laughter again
maybe i just want to laugh happily with them again

and maybe, i should stop being so pathetic bout myself
maybe i should go watch the last airbender tonight, yes maybe.......
maybe i should do things i want to do now, put aside these weird feelings
keep it until i meet my best friend, one by one i would love to knock their head with my knuckles and tell them how cruel and mean and bad they are right now to me! ):