Hurting people is easy.
Moreover, social media triggers more insulation.
I guess weak-hearted people whom easily getting offended or have sensitive heart should not involved too much in social media.
I mean, even me, in my worst state, sometimes do feel offended by some people or some tweets.
Though it probably was not meant for me.
I guess there are several rules, my rules, to stay survived in social media world.
Especially when we are down or weary, it's better to follow these several rules.
Save your heart, save your feeling. Spare.
1. IF YOUR NAME IS NOT THERE, IT'S NOT FOR YOU. MAKE BELIEVE!
Sometimes we see words that kill us inside, either it's by people whom you have problem with, or people you just don't want to remember. It's best to tell yourself, if you're not mentioned, it's not for you. Even the content is offensive regarding to your recall. IT'S NOT FOR YOU. PERIOD.
2. WHEN YOU ARE CURIOUS, STOP.
Curiosity kills. Ignorance is bliss. In social media, it works very well. Sometimes we eager to check timeline of people you usually avoid. Stop checking, stop finding, stop looking for trouble.
3. LOG IN JUST WHEN YOU WANT TO TWEET/UPDATE.
After that, log off. Don't dare yourself to scroll down or up or check recent updates. Back to rule number 2. CURIOSITY KILLS!
4. WHEN THINGS GOT OUT OF HAND, TRY TO IGNORE.
When you see certain things that offend you, or hurt your feeling in any way, try to remember, it's social media, people can speak anything they want, though it's sometimes rubbish. If it doesn't work, try to ignore. If you just feel hurt, log off. If it doesn't help, tweet some more until you feel relieved. WHO CARES AFTERALL? ( :
5. CONFRONT.
I sometimes see some people's timeline and some people, whom coincidentally have issues with me recently, and their tweets seem so offensive, I just go ahead contact them and ask. I know, it's like too impulsive or too to-the-point, but then that's just me, or at least I don't waste time wondering if it's me they're talking about. I prefer ask directly. If they tell the truth then it's good and we can proceed to solve it. If they seem like concealing, then screw them. What I call "friend" would not avoid issue. Moreover if it's stupid/silly/small/minor/unimportant issue. What's good in hiding or keeping hatred? It's stupid, wasting time, and a cancer. But to be honest, most of people I asked directly don't tell the truth, or I end up hurting them in some ways. I guess I'm just too forward.
6. YOU DON'T HAVE TO KEEP REPLYING UNTIL YOU END UP SPEECHLESS.
I don't want to stereotyping Indonesian, but I don't find this particular behavior in any other nationality (or not yet?). But Indonesian usually takes forever to end a conversation. It's like OH-GOSH-ENDLESS. Things usually get out of context and keep going on until it becomes annoyingly random. But unconsciously I also sometimes do that. I just don't feel right when I don't reply any mention or conversation. But it's tiring, really.
7. IGNORE THOSE WHO OCCASIONALLY ANYHOW REPLY/RT.
Usually you tweet something about certain thing or particular people and that person coincidentally RT or reply. It's just hilariously awkward. I usually ignore those who RT or reply without knowing the reasons why I tweet/write it. You really don't have to reply when you don't want to. Even with simple "haha" or "hehe" orany emoticon, when you don't want to, just don't.
8. YOUR WORLD, YOUR RULE, YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.
Since it's yours, you are free to write, say, tweet anything. But then refer back to see if things that you do appropriate to be shared. I mean, straightforward things like updating EVERYTHING you do EVERY SECOND is not important at all right? You're not someone even famous, even if you are, does EVERYBODY want to know EVERYTHING you do? I bet only your die-hard-fans or die-hard-stalker who wants to know about your EVERYTHING. Seriously, I don't care if your daddy just bought you a private island or an airplane. Do you really need to show it to the world? Get a life. You just bought a new g-string, transparent one, you really have to share the picture with everybody, with the world? Moreover if you are wearing it?
Excuse me, what? Jealous?
I'm not jealous, I'm just disgusted.
There's a BIG difference between jealousy and disgust.
Famous people get famous because they become the talk of the town for what they have/achieve, not because they brag about it.
There is a BIG difference between famous people and people who wants to be famous.
Actually it's okay to do anything, in anyway, I also have mute button and also ability to skip your timeline anyway ( :
9. IT'S PERSONAL SPACE.
My twitter is my world. To be exact, I don't expect people to follow me in the first place I created my twitter account. I just want to have fun, but then it ends up like hell. Reason is the more people who follow you, the bigger responsibility to hold what you're saying. However, it's a personal account, not some kind of celebrity or organization or marketing twitter. Too bad some people don't get what twitter is about. But then too bad that sometimes we follow wrong person. LOL
10. FOLLOW/UNFOLLOW. EXISTENCE.
It's not necessarily to follow people who follow you. And you cannot force people to follow you as well. If you have to unfollow someone you know, just fyi even if you unfollow them, doesn't make you stop knowing them. Funny anyway.
And twitter is not something that gives you a million dollar if you reach certain amount of followers or tweets in your timeline.
Who cares if your timeline reaches 1 million tweets?
Who cares if your follower reaches 1 million (in this case, personal twitter)?
Seriously. I don't care.
I use twitter as micro blog, to say things I want to say.
It's not commercial twitter and I am not a celebrity.
I am just a common person who loves to write and speak my mind.
That's all.
Btw, if you find yourself disagree to what I have said, maybe this one is more appropriate for you.
cheers,
meL
Monday, December 26, 2011
drive......me nuts.
Menyetir di Jakarta (jangankan Jakarta, Tangerang aja deh gak usah jauh-jauh) adalah sebuah hal LUAR BIASA yang saya yakin tidak semua orang bisa........dengan benar.
Saya kadang tidak mengerti, beberapa orang menyetir seakan dunia milik mobilnya sendiri.
Ya emang sih, SIM gampang cuma nembak, 2 jam jadi.
Tapi bukan itu inti permasalahannya.
Bagaimana style menyetir anda?
Apakah dengan SIM tembakan (atau tidak), anda mampu menyetir dengan baik dan benar?
Mampu bertoleransi dengan pengemudi lain?
Mampu mengendalikan emosi anda di jalanan?
Ingat, jalanan bukan rumah tangga anda yang bebas lempar piring kala anda emosi.
Contoh simple tadi siang, saya akan pergi ke Gading Serpong dari Lippo.
Sebenarnya kalau saja jalanan baik dan semua pengemudi baik, harusnya sampai di bawah 15 menit, mentok 20-25 menit (dengan kecepatan normal cenderung rendah).
Saya sudah tertinggal sekian menit untuk meeting dengan teman, tentu saya harus sedikit memburu waktu.
Yang terjadi adalah (yaa biasanya kalau buru-buru ada saja kan keadaannya?) mobil depan saya, menyetir dengan super lambat.
Mending kalau lambat jalan di lajurnya, ini lambat dan di tengah-tengah tanpa berniat (atau terlalu CERDAS untuk tidak untuk memberi jalan).
Saat lampu hijau untuk kendaraan yang hendak belok ke kanan, alih-alih dia maju untuk menghentikan laju angkot dan motor yang biasa main seradak-seruduk, dia stop. STATIC di tempat.
Dalam hati saya cuma bisa nyebut "Celaka ini orang antara lagi telepon, baru belajar, atau terlampau cerdas."
Setelah menunggu sekian menit sampai dia maju (setelah rupanya dia bergulat dengan keinginan untuk maju atau beramal kepada sekian banyak angkot dan motor dan menikmati bunyi klakson panjang dari saya dan sekian mobil di belakang).
Belum cukup tadi dia berhenti begitu saja dan melakukan kegiatan amal, lagi-lagi dengan laju sangat amat lambat dia menyusuri jalanan yang notabene sangat sempit itu dan memakan sekian menit hanya untuk belok kiri.
Lagi-lagi di jalanan arah Kelapa Dua menuju Gading Serpong, yang minim lajur dan terlalu sempit untuk menyalip jika muak dengan lambatnya mobil depan, dia menyetir dengat amat sangat lambat.
Mungkin kalau saya akan melahirkan dan bayinya sungsang, saya atau bayi saya sudah mati di jalan (amit-amit).
Emosi sudah sampai di ubun-ubun kepala, diklakson tetap gak mau maju, dilampu tembak tetap begitu.
Akhirnya saya pasrah.
Pasrah untuk mencari celah menyalip si cerdas livina silver itu.
Dengan sepersekian detik dan sepersekian sisa jalanan yang ada, mau tidak mau saya harus memaksa maju untuk menyalip, secara si cerdas itu tetap di tengah-tengah jalan tanpa sedikitpun mengerti untuk sedikit ke kiri.
Karena jalanan di depan berikutnya akan penuh lubang dan polisi tidur, saya ambil chance saya untuk menyalip.
And i did it.
Bukan bermaksud menstereotypingkan, atau berusaha merendahkan gender sendiri (saya perempuan, tulen), rupanya si pengemudi itu perempuan.
Annoying.
Kenapa rata-rata semua orang (baca: laki-laki) yang saya kenal selalu bilang "Pantes lama, perempuan sih" kalau bertemu mobil yang menyetirnya tidak baik atau terlalu lama lajunya?
Kenapa perempuan di sama ratakan kemampuan menyetirnya?
Kenapa para perempuan itu tidak berusaha mengerti bahwa ada ketentuan-ketentuan tertentu dalam berkendara di jalanan?
Semua orang yang menyetir pasti ada masa takut-takutnya.
Saya juga alami.
Tapi di awal dulu saya selalu berusaha tetap pada jalur saya di paling kiri, karena SAYA SADAR SAYA LAMBAT.
Mana pernah sekalipun saya berusaha atau berani menyalip saat saya tahu saya tidak mampu atau tidak berani.
Dan sekali lagi, kalimat motto saya, "Kalau saya bisa, kenapa orang lain tidak bisa?"
Apa susahnya sih belajar untuk mengemudi dengan benar?
Kalau melakukan satu atau dua kesalahan, bisa kan diingat dan diperbaiki tanpa berusaha mengulang?
Apa susahnya belajar menjadi lebih baik?
Hidup saja belajar terus, masa menyetir asal-asalan?
Tidak perlu sok bisa kalau memang tidak bisa.
Kalau belum mampu melaju dengan lancar di jalanan sempit, lewat jalan yang besar.
Tidak perlu sok kencang kalau cuma mencelakakan diri sendiri atau orang lain, tanpa tahu kemampuan diri sendiri dan mobil yang dikendarai.
Anda tahu kalau kemampuan mengerem tiap kendaraan berbeda?
Itu sebabnya 99% supir Metromini tidak pernah mengerem, mereka selalu menghindar.
Kalau memang belum bisa parkir, coba cari ladies parking.
Atau kalau sadar belum bisa parkir, belajar dulu baru ke mall.
Jangan bikin antrian mobil di belakang anda klakson seperti konser orkestra atau menunggu lama hanya karena anda maju mundur berjuta kali hanya untuk memasukkan mobil ke satu kotak.
Modal menyetir bukan cuma nekat atau SIM tembakan.
Ada banyak hal, pengetahuan rambu, tahu jalur anda, tahu batas kecepatan, tahu aturan belok, tahu aturan ini itu.
Jangan jadi batu kali di tengah-tengah jalanan, nyusahin orang lain.
Saya tidak bilang saya jago nyetir.
Yang jelas saya selalu berusaha mematuhi rambu dan aturan.
Saya tidak pernah berusaha mencelakakan orang lain dengan tiba-tiba memotong dari kiri secara tiba-tiba atau memotong lajur orang seenaknya.
Kalau saya sadar saya lambat, saya selalu ambil lajur paling kiri.
Kalau saya mau belok saya selalu kasih lampu sign.
Kalau saya mau pindah jalur saya juga selalu kasih lampu sign.
Tidak ada yang namanya surprise! di jalanan, sepersekian detik menyangkut nyawa anda dan orang lain.
Lebih tepatnya, ketololan dan/atau ketidak mau tahuan anda berpengaruh sangat besar.
REM
Rem mendadak itu sangat menyebalkan buat mobil belakang anda jika sedang di keadaan macet.
Tidak masuk akal jika anda tidak melihat jarak antara anda dan mobil depan anda kan?
Apa susahnya berhenti sesuai jarak aman dan tanpa mengagetkan pengemudi belakang anda?
Jarak aman tidak berlaku saat macet. Stop memberi jarak 30m saat macet parah atau antre di gerbang tol.
Itu namanya toleransi.
Mengerem saat kendaraan depan anda masih sangat amat jauh, luar biasa kekhawatiran dan paranoid anda padahal anda menyetir dengan kecepatan sangat lambat.
Lajur paling kanan di tol adalah untuk kendaraan sangat cepat dan untuk mendahului.
Bukan lajur leha-leha atau untuk belajaran.
Bukan lajur "Oh suka-suka gue dong mau pake lajur mana".
Bukan lajur milik nenek moyang anda
Bukan lajur "Bentar lagi telepon".
Juga bukan lajur dengan kecepatan di bawah 80km/jam.
Saat anda tidak bertoleransi seperti itu, yang terjadi adalah lajur kiri akan menjadi ajang balap Nascar.
Semua yang cepat akan memilih lajur kiri dan MENYALIP dari arah kiri.
Kebayang kan bahayanya?
Tidak ada yang namanya "Suka-suka gue dong mau lewat mana kek" walau jalanan itu yang bikin bapak atau diri anda sendiri sekalipun.
Jalanan itu milik umum dan milik semua orang dan seharusnya semua orang sadar diri.
Tahu bedanya garis lurus dan putus-putus?
Tahu kalau mau belok ke kiri atau kanan harus ambil lajur yang akan anda lalui?
Kalau anda mau ke kanan ya antre di lajur kanan.
Begitu juga kalau anda mau ke kiri.
Bukan potong lajur seenaknya.
Bukan sodok lajur orang.
Semua orang buru-buru, semua orang mau cepat.
Kalau anda tidak bisa belajar antre, bagaimana mau lancar dan cepat?
Saya cukup emosi hari ini dengan traffic yang ada, ketololan-ketololan di jalanan, dan chaosnya jalanan.
Andai semua orang bisa belajar toleransi, mengemudi dengan baik dan benar, dan sedikit mau mengerti kemampuan diri sendiri, mungkin jalanan bisa sedikit lebih terkendali.
Kuncinya cuma ada di diri kita masing-masing kok.
Saya kadang tidak mengerti, beberapa orang menyetir seakan dunia milik mobilnya sendiri.
Ya emang sih, SIM gampang cuma nembak, 2 jam jadi.
Tapi bukan itu inti permasalahannya.
Bagaimana style menyetir anda?
Apakah dengan SIM tembakan (atau tidak), anda mampu menyetir dengan baik dan benar?
Mampu bertoleransi dengan pengemudi lain?
Mampu mengendalikan emosi anda di jalanan?
Ingat, jalanan bukan rumah tangga anda yang bebas lempar piring kala anda emosi.
Contoh simple tadi siang, saya akan pergi ke Gading Serpong dari Lippo.
Sebenarnya kalau saja jalanan baik dan semua pengemudi baik, harusnya sampai di bawah 15 menit, mentok 20-25 menit (dengan kecepatan normal cenderung rendah).
Saya sudah tertinggal sekian menit untuk meeting dengan teman, tentu saya harus sedikit memburu waktu.
Yang terjadi adalah (yaa biasanya kalau buru-buru ada saja kan keadaannya?) mobil depan saya, menyetir dengan super lambat.
Mending kalau lambat jalan di lajurnya, ini lambat dan di tengah-tengah tanpa berniat (atau terlalu CERDAS untuk tidak untuk memberi jalan).
Saat lampu hijau untuk kendaraan yang hendak belok ke kanan, alih-alih dia maju untuk menghentikan laju angkot dan motor yang biasa main seradak-seruduk, dia stop. STATIC di tempat.
Dalam hati saya cuma bisa nyebut "Celaka ini orang antara lagi telepon, baru belajar, atau terlampau cerdas."
Setelah menunggu sekian menit sampai dia maju (setelah rupanya dia bergulat dengan keinginan untuk maju atau beramal kepada sekian banyak angkot dan motor dan menikmati bunyi klakson panjang dari saya dan sekian mobil di belakang).
Belum cukup tadi dia berhenti begitu saja dan melakukan kegiatan amal, lagi-lagi dengan laju sangat amat lambat dia menyusuri jalanan yang notabene sangat sempit itu dan memakan sekian menit hanya untuk belok kiri.
Lagi-lagi di jalanan arah Kelapa Dua menuju Gading Serpong, yang minim lajur dan terlalu sempit untuk menyalip jika muak dengan lambatnya mobil depan, dia menyetir dengat amat sangat lambat.
Mungkin kalau saya akan melahirkan dan bayinya sungsang, saya atau bayi saya sudah mati di jalan (amit-amit).
Emosi sudah sampai di ubun-ubun kepala, diklakson tetap gak mau maju, dilampu tembak tetap begitu.
Akhirnya saya pasrah.
Pasrah untuk mencari celah menyalip si cerdas livina silver itu.
Dengan sepersekian detik dan sepersekian sisa jalanan yang ada, mau tidak mau saya harus memaksa maju untuk menyalip, secara si cerdas itu tetap di tengah-tengah jalan tanpa sedikitpun mengerti untuk sedikit ke kiri.
Karena jalanan di depan berikutnya akan penuh lubang dan polisi tidur, saya ambil chance saya untuk menyalip.
And i did it.
Bukan bermaksud menstereotypingkan, atau berusaha merendahkan gender sendiri (saya perempuan, tulen), rupanya si pengemudi itu perempuan.
Annoying.
Kenapa rata-rata semua orang (baca: laki-laki) yang saya kenal selalu bilang "Pantes lama, perempuan sih" kalau bertemu mobil yang menyetirnya tidak baik atau terlalu lama lajunya?
Kenapa perempuan di sama ratakan kemampuan menyetirnya?
Kenapa para perempuan itu tidak berusaha mengerti bahwa ada ketentuan-ketentuan tertentu dalam berkendara di jalanan?
Semua orang yang menyetir pasti ada masa takut-takutnya.
Saya juga alami.
Tapi di awal dulu saya selalu berusaha tetap pada jalur saya di paling kiri, karena SAYA SADAR SAYA LAMBAT.
Mana pernah sekalipun saya berusaha atau berani menyalip saat saya tahu saya tidak mampu atau tidak berani.
Dan sekali lagi, kalimat motto saya, "Kalau saya bisa, kenapa orang lain tidak bisa?"
Apa susahnya sih belajar untuk mengemudi dengan benar?
Kalau melakukan satu atau dua kesalahan, bisa kan diingat dan diperbaiki tanpa berusaha mengulang?
Apa susahnya belajar menjadi lebih baik?
Hidup saja belajar terus, masa menyetir asal-asalan?
Tidak perlu sok bisa kalau memang tidak bisa.
Kalau belum mampu melaju dengan lancar di jalanan sempit, lewat jalan yang besar.
Tidak perlu sok kencang kalau cuma mencelakakan diri sendiri atau orang lain, tanpa tahu kemampuan diri sendiri dan mobil yang dikendarai.
Anda tahu kalau kemampuan mengerem tiap kendaraan berbeda?
Itu sebabnya 99% supir Metromini tidak pernah mengerem, mereka selalu menghindar.
Kalau memang belum bisa parkir, coba cari ladies parking.
Atau kalau sadar belum bisa parkir, belajar dulu baru ke mall.
Jangan bikin antrian mobil di belakang anda klakson seperti konser orkestra atau menunggu lama hanya karena anda maju mundur berjuta kali hanya untuk memasukkan mobil ke satu kotak.
Modal menyetir bukan cuma nekat atau SIM tembakan.
Ada banyak hal, pengetahuan rambu, tahu jalur anda, tahu batas kecepatan, tahu aturan belok, tahu aturan ini itu.
Jangan jadi batu kali di tengah-tengah jalanan, nyusahin orang lain.
Saya tidak bilang saya jago nyetir.
Yang jelas saya selalu berusaha mematuhi rambu dan aturan.
Saya tidak pernah berusaha mencelakakan orang lain dengan tiba-tiba memotong dari kiri secara tiba-tiba atau memotong lajur orang seenaknya.
Kalau saya sadar saya lambat, saya selalu ambil lajur paling kiri.
Kalau saya mau belok saya selalu kasih lampu sign.
Kalau saya mau pindah jalur saya juga selalu kasih lampu sign.
Tidak ada yang namanya surprise! di jalanan, sepersekian detik menyangkut nyawa anda dan orang lain.
Lebih tepatnya, ketololan dan/atau ketidak mau tahuan anda berpengaruh sangat besar.
REM
Rem mendadak itu sangat menyebalkan buat mobil belakang anda jika sedang di keadaan macet.
Tidak masuk akal jika anda tidak melihat jarak antara anda dan mobil depan anda kan?
Apa susahnya berhenti sesuai jarak aman dan tanpa mengagetkan pengemudi belakang anda?
Jarak aman tidak berlaku saat macet. Stop memberi jarak 30m saat macet parah atau antre di gerbang tol.
Itu namanya toleransi.
Mengerem saat kendaraan depan anda masih sangat amat jauh, luar biasa kekhawatiran dan paranoid anda padahal anda menyetir dengan kecepatan sangat lambat.
Lajur paling kanan di tol adalah untuk kendaraan sangat cepat dan untuk mendahului.
Bukan lajur leha-leha atau untuk belajaran.
Bukan lajur "Oh suka-suka gue dong mau pake lajur mana".
Bukan lajur milik nenek moyang anda
Bukan lajur "Bentar lagi telepon".
Juga bukan lajur dengan kecepatan di bawah 80km/jam.
Saat anda tidak bertoleransi seperti itu, yang terjadi adalah lajur kiri akan menjadi ajang balap Nascar.
Semua yang cepat akan memilih lajur kiri dan MENYALIP dari arah kiri.
Kebayang kan bahayanya?
Tidak ada yang namanya "Suka-suka gue dong mau lewat mana kek" walau jalanan itu yang bikin bapak atau diri anda sendiri sekalipun.
Jalanan itu milik umum dan milik semua orang dan seharusnya semua orang sadar diri.
Tahu bedanya garis lurus dan putus-putus?
Tahu kalau mau belok ke kiri atau kanan harus ambil lajur yang akan anda lalui?
Kalau anda mau ke kanan ya antre di lajur kanan.
Begitu juga kalau anda mau ke kiri.
Bukan potong lajur seenaknya.
Bukan sodok lajur orang.
Semua orang buru-buru, semua orang mau cepat.
Kalau anda tidak bisa belajar antre, bagaimana mau lancar dan cepat?
Saya cukup emosi hari ini dengan traffic yang ada, ketololan-ketololan di jalanan, dan chaosnya jalanan.
Andai semua orang bisa belajar toleransi, mengemudi dengan baik dan benar, dan sedikit mau mengerti kemampuan diri sendiri, mungkin jalanan bisa sedikit lebih terkendali.
Kuncinya cuma ada di diri kita masing-masing kok.
Saturday, December 24, 2011
bizzarely incomplete.
Listening to Lady Antebellum - I Need You Know right around 1 AM, sobbing so hard, crying my heart out..........
Seems familiar?
When the word: It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.......
is being sung, it strikes me so hard, even makes my sob and tears getting worse.
That's what i went through last Saturday.
But that's not what i want to talk right now.
Who the hell cares with my love life.
Well it is indirectly connected but my case isn't my point.
What i want to talk about here and now, is the idea of how people can be so easily saying "it's okay, i know how you feel".
While most of the time they never experience it themselves.
Simple example: watching the infotainment, there's a celebrity who's having an affair, most of us would say "how can they do that. that is just so wrong"
But, really?
Have we really ever felt the same way like that?
Or have we really ever experienced the exact same condition?
For me, I used to say that.
From social point of view, doing something WRONG is wrong.
There's boundary, there's parameter.
Like: when you're married you're not supposed to be having a relationship with other people.
I agree to that statement. But to what extend?
I haven't got married yet.
I haven't experienced that so how could I say that's wrong or right?
Just according to social perspective and moral issue.
Someone, a person, told me: "when it comes to heart (feeling-wise) we can't control it at all."
Another simple example, from my own experience:
When I was young, my friend asked me what should she do at that time when she found out her boyfriend was cheating. I simply said "break him up" but she was so stubborn to hold on to her relationship and I didn't know why would she do that. Then came to one point, when I experienced the same thing. My friend did tell me the exact same thing, to break him up.
But did I do that right away?
No I didn't.
Who says it's easy?
Who says it's simple?
I knew it wasn't right, but i knew i couldn't lie to my heart.
Thus from that point i understand how it feels to be in that situation.
I mean, we have options. to forgive/forget and take a chance (even for being hurt once more or over and over again by the same guy), to follow our hearts, or to just go ahead dump that stupid man.
Okay it doesn't make any sense, right?
But I did once.
So I know how it feels like.
I know I was being so stupid and silly by forgetting and forgiving him, but in reality, I am getting stronger from that point until now.
I learned something.
But the most important thing is: I don't regret that I was following my heart at that time.
Several of worst feelings, of what hurts the most according to me are:
1. Just like what Rascal Flatts says: what hurts the most was being so close and having so much to say and watching you walk away.
Tell me it doesn't hurt when you have someone so close, you know that they're within your ability to reach and grasp, but you just can't because it is slipping through your fingers.
2. What hurts the most is when you know you care for someone so much, one day, they're breaking down and falling apart and you can't do anything just because you're merely nobody for them.
3. What hurts the most is when someone who once your everything turns into stranger.
4. What hurts the most is when you thought you have everything with someone, and when they're gone, you realize you never had anything.
5. What hurts the most is when you just can't tell yourself to let go what you should have.
6. What hurts the most is when you are lost, not knowing what to do.
7. What hurts the most is when you miss someone so much yet they don't give a damn about you at all.
8. What hurts the most is seeing someone from afar, seeing their back, once you used to hold. Yet you can do nothing about it.
9. What hurts the most is fighting so hard to just fall even harder in the end.
10. What hurts the most is being judged by the one you love the most.
Seems familiar?
When the word: It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.......
is being sung, it strikes me so hard, even makes my sob and tears getting worse.
That's what i went through last Saturday.
But that's not what i want to talk right now.
Who the hell cares with my love life.
Well it is indirectly connected but my case isn't my point.
What i want to talk about here and now, is the idea of how people can be so easily saying "it's okay, i know how you feel".
While most of the time they never experience it themselves.
Simple example: watching the infotainment, there's a celebrity who's having an affair, most of us would say "how can they do that. that is just so wrong"
But, really?
Have we really ever felt the same way like that?
Or have we really ever experienced the exact same condition?
For me, I used to say that.
From social point of view, doing something WRONG is wrong.
There's boundary, there's parameter.
Like: when you're married you're not supposed to be having a relationship with other people.
I agree to that statement. But to what extend?
I haven't got married yet.
I haven't experienced that so how could I say that's wrong or right?
Just according to social perspective and moral issue.
Someone, a person, told me: "when it comes to heart (feeling-wise) we can't control it at all."
Another simple example, from my own experience:
When I was young, my friend asked me what should she do at that time when she found out her boyfriend was cheating. I simply said "break him up" but she was so stubborn to hold on to her relationship and I didn't know why would she do that. Then came to one point, when I experienced the same thing. My friend did tell me the exact same thing, to break him up.
But did I do that right away?
No I didn't.
Who says it's easy?
Who says it's simple?
I knew it wasn't right, but i knew i couldn't lie to my heart.
Thus from that point i understand how it feels to be in that situation.
I mean, we have options. to forgive/forget and take a chance (even for being hurt once more or over and over again by the same guy), to follow our hearts, or to just go ahead dump that stupid man.
Okay it doesn't make any sense, right?
But I did once.
So I know how it feels like.
I know I was being so stupid and silly by forgetting and forgiving him, but in reality, I am getting stronger from that point until now.
I learned something.
But the most important thing is: I don't regret that I was following my heart at that time.
Several of worst feelings, of what hurts the most according to me are:
1. Just like what Rascal Flatts says: what hurts the most was being so close and having so much to say and watching you walk away.
Tell me it doesn't hurt when you have someone so close, you know that they're within your ability to reach and grasp, but you just can't because it is slipping through your fingers.
2. What hurts the most is when you know you care for someone so much, one day, they're breaking down and falling apart and you can't do anything just because you're merely nobody for them.
3. What hurts the most is when someone who once your everything turns into stranger.
4. What hurts the most is when you thought you have everything with someone, and when they're gone, you realize you never had anything.
5. What hurts the most is when you just can't tell yourself to let go what you should have.
6. What hurts the most is when you are lost, not knowing what to do.
7. What hurts the most is when you miss someone so much yet they don't give a damn about you at all.
8. What hurts the most is seeing someone from afar, seeing their back, once you used to hold. Yet you can do nothing about it.
9. What hurts the most is fighting so hard to just fall even harder in the end.
10. What hurts the most is being judged by the one you love the most.
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